I’ve made up my mind. I’m joining the Navy. I’m not giving a fuck about anything that is said to me. I’m doing it for myself. This will give me a good push in the direction I NEED to go in. No friends. No family. Just the people who are there with you on duty. I wanna get stationed FAR away from everyone I know. Nobody shall know me. Nobody needs to know the truth.
I always thought you were like some superhero. Perfect. Young at heart. Good-hearted, too. But no. After today…what you told me.. I cannot and will not forgive you. You’re weak. I still love you…but………..you were my last hope for fucking humanity.
I love you so much, but you’re weak, as well. Dad told me what you did. I can’t believe you. Maybe that’s where I get my tendencies from. You. Dad threatens to do them…but you actually attempted to fulfill one. I cannot believe you. I’m about to give up on everything.
Hahahahahahahahaha….why…do people fucking fail ALL the time? The simplest test. A test of trust. Yet, these friends continue to break it. I use the term lightly, I suppose. As of now. I don’t trust anybody. Fuck everyone. I’ll be fine on my own.
I can’t get you out of my mind. Why is your smile shining through the dark of my mind and causing me to smile? You constantly say you’re ugly and nothing is attractive about you. The thing is… I wouldn’t want you any other way. I adore everything about you. The funny thing is, the thing I like most is disagreeing with you about the way you look, but…we all know that’s not the only thing I like about you. You’re funny…extremely funny. You can make me laugh with the simple words that spill out of your mouth. You really don’t even have to try. You find your way into my mind and you stay there. Nobody else has this effect. Just you. You. All I want right now.
I woke up to the sound of the woman who thinks she’s my mother yelling at me. Now, the girl I can’t stop thinking about heard what happened on Halloween. Damn it. Why is it so hard for me to do what’s right?
I’ve been questioning my existence recently. Do people really take me seriously? If I were to answer that, I would say no. Nobody takes me seriously. I’m a joke to them. However, that changes once they need something, and then when I give it to them, I’m back to being a joke.
Good night. Oh, such a good night. No worries, no cares, things just flowed through the night. Oh, yes. The kind of night I live for. However, I am upset with one choice I made. Gah, why does liking this girl make me feel this way?? It feels so different.
I really want a kid. I mean, like, I don’t want one right now because I wouldn’t be able to afford to care of it, but I mean, I want to take care of my own child. Feed it, hold it, love it, raise it, etc. I really want to be the best dad there can ever be. I want my kid to look up to me like I’m some kind of superhero or something. I want my little kid to pick me up with its naivety when I’m feeling down.